In most Pakistani nikah ceremonies, there is a moment when the Nikah Registrar quietly draws a line through one of the columns. Few people notice. Fewer still know what that column was. It is column 18 of the standard nikahnama, and it asks whether the husband has delegated the right of divorce to the wife, known as talaq-e-tafweez.
This article explains what that column means, why it matters, and how couples can talk about it calmly before the nikah instead of leaving it to habit. It is general information, not legal or religious advice; for your specific situation, consult a family lawyer or a qualified scholar.
What talaq-e-tafweez means
"Tafweez" means delegation. Through column 18, the husband can delegate to the wife the right to pronounce divorce, either without conditions or under conditions that the couple specify. If this right is granted, the wife can end the marriage by exercising that delegated right and following the legal procedure, rather than having to apply to a family court for khula.
This option is recognised in Islamic jurisprudence and is part of the standard nikahnama used in Pakistan. It is not a modern invention, and it is not a statement that the marriage is expected to fail.
How it differs from khula
- Khula is a process through which a wife seeks dissolution of the marriage through a family court. It typically involves court proceedings, and in many cases the wife may be asked to return the dower or other benefits received.
- Talaq-e-tafweez, when granted, allows the wife to exercise a right the husband has already delegated to her in the nikahnama. The required legal notice procedure still applies, in the same way as when a husband pronounces talaq, including notice to the Chairman of the Union Council and a waiting period for reconciliation.
Because the details matter, and because the law and its interpretation can change, a family lawyer is the right person to explain exactly how it would apply in your case.
Why the column is often crossed out
- Habit. Registrars and families have struck it out for generations, sometimes without asking anyone.
- Misunderstanding. Some believe it is disrespectful to the groom or a bad omen.
- Pressure. Brides are rarely asked directly, and often feel unable to raise it.
None of these is a good reason to decide something so important without discussion.
Arguments families raise, and calmer ways to see them
"It means we do not trust him."
Many families see it the way they see a carefully written dower: a safeguard that, ideally, is never used. Trust and safeguards can exist together.
"It will make divorce easy."
The legal procedure, including notice and a reconciliation period, still applies. And couples can attach conditions, for example that the right may be exercised only in specific circumstances such as a second marriage without consent, cruelty, or failure to provide maintenance for a set period.
"Nobody in our family has done this."
Every family custom started somewhere. The question is whether the couple, after understanding it, want it.
Options couples can consider
- Grant the right unconditionally.
- Grant it with specific conditions, written clearly in column 18.
- Not grant it, after both have discussed and agreed.
Any of these can be a reasonable choice. What matters is that it is a choice, made knowingly by the two people getting married.
How to bring it up
- Discuss it during the dower and nikahnama conversation, weeks before the nikah, not on the day.
- Frame it as part of reading the whole nikahnama together. Our nikahnama guide covers every important column, so no single one feels singled out.
- Let the bride and groom speak directly. Parents can advise, but the decision belongs to the couple.
- Get advice from a scholar or lawyer both families respect if there is disagreement.
Practical points on the nikah day
- Tell the Nikah Registrar in advance what has been agreed for column 18.
- Make sure the column is filled exactly as agreed, including any conditions.
- Read the completed form before signing; do not let anyone strike out a column you agreed to fill.
- Keep a clear copy of the signed nikahnama.
For grooms
Agreeing to column 18 can be a powerful signal of respect and confidence in the marriage. If you have concerns, discuss them honestly and consider conditions rather than an outright refusal. A marriage begins better with a conversation than with a silent line through a column.
For brides
You are entitled to ask about this column and to understand it. Asking is not impolite. If your family is uncomfortable raising it, ask someone you trust, perhaps an older sibling or relative, to help.
Examples of conditions couples sometimes consider
Couples who choose to grant the delegated right with conditions often link it to specific circumstances. Examples families have discussed include:
- If the husband contracts another marriage without the first wife's consent.
- If the husband fails to provide maintenance for a stated period.
- If the husband leaves the wife without contact for a stated period.
- If there is cruelty or abuse.
- If an agreed condition in column 17, such as the right to continue education, is not honoured.
These are illustrations, not recommendations. Any condition should be clearly worded, lawful and genuinely agreed. A family lawyer can help phrase conditions so they are clear and enforceable.
How families can have the conversation
A respectful way to start is to discuss the whole nikahnama together, column by column, a few weeks before the nikah. When you reach column 18, the bride's father or mother might say: "This column is about the delegated right of divorce. We wanted to understand how your family usually approaches it, and what our children prefer." This frames it as part of an ordinary review, not a special demand.
The groom's family might respond by sharing their view and any concerns. If there is disagreement, suggest asking a respected scholar or lawyer to explain the options to both families together. Many concerns ease once everyone understands how the column actually works.
Common misunderstandings
"It gives the wife more rights than the husband."
The husband retains his own right of divorce; column 18 concerns whether he delegates a right to the wife, and on what terms. It is an agreement between them.
"If we fill it, the Nikah Registrar will object."
Column 18 is part of the standard form. The Nikah Registrar's role is to record what the parties have agreed, not to decide for them.
"It can be added later."
Changing the terms of a registered nikahnama afterwards is not straightforward. If it matters to you, discuss it before the nikah.
The bigger picture: informed consent
Column 18 is one example of a broader principle: both people should understand and agree to the terms of their marriage. The same applies to dower, conditions and living arrangements. Couples who discuss these matters calmly before the nikah often find the conversations bring them closer, because they learn how the other person thinks about fairness and responsibility.
Frequently asked questions
Does granting column 18 make divorce more likely?
There is no reason to assume so. For many couples it is simply a safeguard that is never used. A marriage's strength depends on how the couple treat each other, not on a column.
Who decides: the families or the couple?
The couple, with their families' advice. It is their marriage and their rights.
Where can we get reliable advice?
A family lawyer for legal aspects, and a qualified scholar both families respect for religious questions.
Final thought
Column 18 is one line on one form, but it represents a bigger principle: that the terms of a marriage should be understood and agreed by both people entering it. Read every column, ask every question, and sign only what you understand.
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